Monday, June 27, 2011

We Want More Captain

Dear Derek,

We know you are working hard to get back to work, and although Mr. Nunez hasn't played poorly, his cast iron hands are a constant reminder to us how much we need you.  Not to mention you're just a few AB's away from the 3,000 club and that's gonna sell a crap load of memorabilia and I got a buddy who owns two stands at the Stadium so ...we look forward to that milestone.  While you are reading this, and getting a back rub from a bikini wearing Ms. Kelly, ...I am left wondering why I am even writing to you as I struggle to hold that visual in my head.

Yours truly,
The Fans Maldonado

Monday, June 20, 2011

National Nova

As Nova tosses another 'who'dathunkit six inning sketch in the sand', the Yanks find themselves on a bit of a hot streak. Does this mean I've forgotten all about their complete INCOMPETENCE against the ballerinas from Beantown? No freaking way.

I wanna see some Red Legged destruction come September and that might mean we need to call on the CashMan to pull a few strings and break out the Amex card. Are you listening Brian?

Friday, June 10, 2011

ENOUGH ALREADY

Hey Hal, Hank, et al,
Are you freaking kidding me? This isn't an end-of-the-world rant because it is only June but there's something bigger going on here. The Yankees have always maintained a dominant attitude towards the lesser men from Boston and now all this, "Be patient" BS has come to translate to a lackadaisical team who gets their head's handed to them by red legged ugly people. ENOUGH.

Go get me a pitcher and I don't care if you he's from the South Pole. Get a REAL batting coach or fire all your Hall of Famer's hitting .280 or less. And someone tell Girardi to let the buzz cut grow out a little, will ya?

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Western Front

Facing the best pitchers the West Coast could offer, the Yanks now head home with a 6-3 on the trip, also swiping a few Pina Coladas on the way. Tex came up big today hitting two.  Swisher did his part. And John Sterling had John Sterling moments.

Good thing too, because on this upcoming home stand we got Indians, Rangers and those awful losers from Beantown next up on the schedule.  Hopefully the staff can piece together a few decent starts and the New York sun can heat up these bats.

And as The Captain's 3000th approaches the eyes will become more and more focused on Derek. Let's see if he can get it at home and toss in a little of that Jeter flair.

Monday, May 23, 2011

Grandyman's Sweet

If it weren't for Curtis Granderson the Yankees might be looking up at more teams than we'd like to admit here, this guy's been amazing.

What is it Curtis? Are you eating double porterhouses at Smith & Wollensky's every other day?

Can some of our other sluggers try and pick it up to at least a slow jog here before we hit June?

OK enough of this, I'm heading to Ray's for a midnight slice.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

This Colon Smells Like Victory

Bartolo who woulda thunk? You look like you should be fishing for bluefish on the shores of some sandy beach head but instead you toss inning after inning of ball for us. You keep us in games and even when it takes a few extra innings, you propel us to victory. How about that.

Now if we can just get some HITS.

Monday, May 16, 2011

Bronx Zoology

If I didn't know better I'd thought I was wearing my Tony Manero white three piece while doubling up on some slices from Ray's...because this team reminds me of '78 when we could see early on Billy's drinking and Reggie's straw-stirring weren't a good match.

Jorge apologizes but to who? Cashman makes amends but for what? The Yankee brass is supposedly angry at Jeter but why? Suddenly this thing's got us playing Marcia Clark and her haircut would look awful on me. So let's not.

Let's give Jorge the benefit of the doubt. Whatever that even means. Let's say all of you, Cash, Joe G, Jeter, Swisher, Harpo and even Zeppo, howsa bout ALL of you get together and figure out a ways to WIN.

OK?

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Bronx Chaos

As the vaunted Yankees dropped ANOTHER game to those yellow bellied jack o lanterns from Beantown, Jorge Posada asks out of the game and then all hell broke loose. Joe Buck sat there stammering with Sarah Silverman, a famous pink hat, while Tim McCarver looked as if he wanted to leave the country. Two bleeps later FOX was hoping to return their credibility (wait, ....ok nevermind) when Cashman goes on and says "it wasn't injury it was...". When did Brian Cashman turn into Monte Hall? I want answers people.

So as we sit here awaiting word on what's up Georgie, we need to figure out how to make this team better. Kevin Long? Hey Hall of Famer's go through long stretches where nobody can hit and nobody looks around at this guy. Messing with Jeter's swing, changing Alex's leg kick, suddenly this guys turning into Bob Fosse.

Gimme a freaking break.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Freedom Rings

It's only appropriate that the greatest team that ever was claims victory on this day. God Bless America and the New York Yankees.

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Balti-less Is More

So off we went, our yearly excursion to the land of crab cakes and rain showers. The Yankees went on a three game set to Baltimore and ended up playing two, because of Friday night's constant drizzle. What that meant for me was something akin to a Roman Festival Meal at a local seafood house on the pier. Mussels in white wine should be served at da Stadium without question.

The Pin Stripes won both games, one a big hitting laugher and another a nervous laugher in extra innings. Granderson looks to be saving our bacon a bit much for a number 2 hitter but we'll take it.

We will be back to do some more damage later in the year and hopefully the city has double upped on tartar sauce by then.